So it’s been a week and a half since I decided to run this half-marathon in January. I still think I am absolutely crazy, but I’m also intrigued. Last week I ran a mile each day for 5 days. It started out rough, being that I haven’t ran for anything other than to answer my phone, in the last 6 years. So I figured a mile would be a good starting point. This week I decided to push a little harder and run a mile and a quarter. 1.25 miles! Not much of a difference, or so I thought. The first day running the 1.25 almost killed me! I got the worst stomach cramps and it felt like someone put a bag over my head that had a built in heater. It seemed to get bad about half way through that last lap. It took everything I had to finish. In my mind I was thinking… “You are pathetic. One extra lap! You feel this shitty over 1 extra lap?!” I refused to quit and pushed through it but when I finished I felt horrible. My face was bright red and my head was on fire! In the past this has been the reason I have stopped working out. The second I feel bad, I quit. Horrible mentality to have, I know. This day I was upset and feeling like 13.1 miles is completely out of my reach. Defeated and Discouraged.
Today I ran that 1.25 miles again and I was fine afterwards. I had to talk myself through it but I made it without the head heater turning on… So today, I feel accomplished. I know that 1.25 miles is really not a big deal, but to me, at this moment, it is. As long as I am improving, I feel good about this commitment. Commitment is a word I whisper to myself through out every run I’ve done so far. It keeps me going and holds me accountable. I have committed to this run and I will not quit!
I figured out a few tricks that work for me. As I walk to the gym, I put on slower music and try to relax. I admire the trees, running water, and leaves around me. The second I step foot in the gym I turn on fast music. Music that makes me want to kick someone’s ass. That someone being the tread mill. I listen to this as I run. As soon as I’m done running I turn my music back to something slow and calming. I walk back to my apartment and enjoy the view as I breathe and smile at my small accomplishment. In the past, this would have sounded a little corny to me. But now it sounds like something that helps me. It’s the little things that I choose to enjoy in order to keep me going…
Week Two of Half-Marathon training is slow but I am feeling encouraged. Next week my sister will be here and we will hit the pavement so I can feel what it’s like to run outside. Not really looking forward to it, but I’m up for the challenge.