So You’ve got Love… What Else?

Lately I have been thinking a lot about Love.  I have been going through some difficult times and I’ve had to lean on my husband for some guidance and support.  I am a control freak who prefers to fix problems on my own but that is one of the beautiful things about having someone in your life.  You don’t have to do everything on your own! I am reminded that I made the right choice when picking my partner.  It is comforting to know that although things won’t always work out the way I want them to, I have the right person standing next to me to face life’s challenges.

What do you look for in a life partner?

Unconditional love is an important factor when you decide to spend the rest of your life with someone.  Unconditional love  is completely different than lust and/or puppy love.  Unconditional love is developed when life is experienced together.  Without life events, without time and without struggle it is hard for couples to understand what life will be like during the hard times.  Can you honestly know that you will be behind your partner through any and everything if you haven’t experienced much life together?  I believe in love at first site.  BUT that kind of love isn’t the same love that is experienced after spending years together.  Many couples move so quickly because they are blinded by the excitement of new love.  I was guilty of this at the beginning of my relationship with my husband.  We moved in together after 6 months of dating, (I don’t necessarily suggest this).  It worked for us and our relationship continued to grow but I didn’t develop this “Unconditional” love for a few years.  I felt love for him very quickly but looking back I can see that those feelings were different from the very deep and serious feelings I have now.  We have lived and experienced life together. Before getting married we spent the time getting to know each other and how we dealt with life events.  We had to decide if we could be with each other for the rest of our lives.  We learned how to be together during difficult times in each others lives.  We learned each other’s strengths and weaknesses.  We learned how to build a successful life together.  I believe that successful marriages are built after people have taken time to really get to know each other and after making the sometimes hard decision of “Is this person truly the best partner for me?”  Marriage is definitely about love but it is absolutely NOT built on love alone.

If they love you unconditionally and you feel the same, together you will strive to make each other happy at all costs.

If they respect you and believe you are their equal, your marriage will be one of understanding.

If you honor them and help their dreams come true, they will lean on you as their one true partner.

If they push you and encourage you to accomplish your goals, you will appreciate them for standing behind you.

If together you are loyal, comforting, driven and genuine there is nothing you can not accomplish.

If LOVE comes before all else you will live a life of content until ever after…

What do you look for in your partner?   For those of you who are married, what are the key factors that make your relationships work?

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